I get it, you REALLY love bacon. You’ve got your ironic, pre-faded bacon shirt on, your bacon toothpaste and your bacon gum. You’ve got bacon fudge and bacon cake and bacon pride.
I think what you really like is the idea of bacon. Oh, sure, it tastes great too. Our bodies are drawn to high fat, high salt foods. But there’s something much more than that- bacon has become a symbol. Bacon hipsters are never just, “I like bacon” but rather, “Screw you, I like bacon.” Strangely enough, bacon has become a symbol against “The Man.” It’s a reaction to all the health food, all the Greenies, all the talk of recycling and global warming.
Bacon is smoking. It’s cool because it’s devil-may-care. It’s the “screw-the-future -I’m living-in-the-now food.” It’s the riding on a motorcycle without a helmet thing to do. It’s an obvious reaction because we’re bored with all the talk of veggie burgers and gluten free pasta. No one wants to be told to eat their veggies. So you say, “I know this is bad for me and I don’t care. It tastes good and you can’t stop me.”
You bacon fanatics don’t need to be told it’s bad for you. You know. You don’t need to be told that pigs are smarter than dogs. You’ve heard. You don’t need to be told the horrendous, unsanitary conditions pigs are raised and killed in. That’s part of the charm.
Bacon is pigs but it seems to me Bacon Hipsters are cattle.
AWESOME.
I have a complete suit made of bacon.
It is actually stylish. But in an ironic way.
(It does look good with a pork-pie hat, but I’m not going for cheap puns here.)